A few years ago, I was at a place of great discomfort. All of my familiar places of normalcy left me feeling empty and unsure. Somehow in my progression from being a young woman who was ‘going places’, I had become a middle-aged lady without a destination, a map or even any gas to go somewhere.
My un-wellness manifested itself in several areas of my life:
I felt disconnected from my body, like it had betrayed me. It would not operate or function like it had in the past; exercise-resistant body fat and hot flashes were my new normal. I thought I knew the “right” things to do like “eat right and exercise”, but I could not summon the courage to do them.
I doubted my mind and its ability to make plans. I was uncertain of who I was, what I was about, what I even wanted, or if I could change.
I felt lonely and detached from my family and friends. It seemed that this affliction was mine alone, that no one understood me.
I knew there was a God, but I felt disconnected from Its Presence. God/The Divine/The Universe all seemed like made-up names, lame attempts at making the intangible tangible. My soul was covered in layers of fear, disgust, shame, and anger; I could not see its purpose. I questioned whether I even had one.
I felt Unworthy. Broken. Messed up. Unrecoverable. A lost cause.
Not only had I lost me, I had nearly given up on finding me.
So What Changed?
In short, a conversation with a friend. Someone who understood what I was going through, because they were feeling the same way as I was. We both spoke of feeling:
somewhat suspended in fear of being “stuck in this way”
frustrated that life had changed so dramatically
angry at our body for not looking like it had before
seemingly powerless to shift directions
doubtful about what could work to remedy this situation; and also
wondering if this messy version of ourselves had any potential left in it?
In talking with my friend, I felt heard, understood and seen without feeling judged. And I felt something I had not felt in quite awhile: I felt hopeful of the possibility that I could change.
Together we formed a plan. Each of us choosing a small first step, a weekly behavior we would uphold, checking in with the other for accountability. Our choice was quite the opposite of a “must wear a size 2 by my birthday” kind of goal, as this was about action, not about achievement vs. failure.
I wish I could say, ‘and the rest is history’, but that would shortcut a long colorful journey of learning how to best care for myself that has taken me several years. As of late, I am place of contentment with myself, yet curious of how I can continue to develop the full potential that my Divine Creator envisioned.
What I can share with you are the foundational pieces essential to my personal transformation:
Having Support. At first, it was just one friend, but eventually, it became a group of women who I could be open and vulnerable with, trusting they would keep my confidences. A group where everyone had an equal seat at the table, and all experiences were valid and affirmed. There I absorbed so much from the others that it changed how I viewed myself and approached my process of change.
Having a Guide. Although I started my wellness journey with a trusted friend, eventually, I found a coach. My coach was able to see things I did not, and gently bring them to my awareness. She then invited me to observe that information and together we decided on my next action. She empowered me by holding space for me, and always reminding me that I was the expert of my own body.
Having a Framework. And by framework, I mean a plan for approaching my wellness goals. I chose an online coaching program (the same software that I choose to use with my clients today). This gave me one location to get research-based, proven nutrition information, instead of relying on media messages (fitness magazines, blogs, Facebook, etc.). And it provided me a place to check-in daily, where my coach could oversee my responses to the weekly lessons, and give me feedback and encouragement. This framework allowed for adjustments, so I had the freedom I needed to choose what was right for me, but still there was accountability to keep me focused.
Having a Daily Quiet Time. I had identified with some traditional religious teachings and would start my day with reading a daily devotional. It evolved into something bigger: reading, movement, meditation and soul-searching. This time in silence became a grounding point for me...where in the stillness, I could hear my own voice, my reflections and my yearnings, and set intentions for the day or week ahead. It allowed me to reconnect to myself and in doing so, open up a channel for the Great Divine to flow through me. Through this process, many layers began to fall away, and I could see and hear my soul's purpose.
Which is to help people just like you.
Does this sound like you?
Uncertain if you can ever get your body to change because right now it feels like your enemy?
Feeling like you are stuck without motivation, or thinking that the way forward is just too hard?
Feeling a bit disconnected from well-meaning friends and family who tell you that you are wonderful and you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself and just things as they are?
Overwhelmed by your internal dialogue that tells you that you are so far from perfect that you should just give up and accept you will never get what you truly desire?
Wondering if you even matter...finding it hard to believe that your life has meaning and purpose?
Imagine instead that you could feel:
Peaceful and at-home in your body. It feels like an old friend, a partner; you understand its rhythms, cues and messages. You have learned how to find satisfaction and pleasure from food without restriction or excess, and you choose methods of movement for your body as part of compassionate self-care, not out of obligation or shame.
Confident in your choices, and can see how they align with your deepest values. When a choice takes you out of those boundaries, you have the experience and skill to know how to re-start, coaching yourself along the way, resisting health marketing messages and fitness myths with ease. You trust in your capability and competence.
Empowered to fully engage in your life, to take calculated risks, to move out of your comfort zone with curiosity, and to pursue and achieve your heart’s desires, on your own terms.
Limitless in knowing you are a intentionally-created being of abundant potential, with a deep reservoir of innate understanding about how you operate best and what your true needs are. You are worthy of all life has to offer and have reclaimed your Divine Inheritance: Peace, Love and Joy.
How I Can Help You
I guide you through learning and establishing the rituals and practices for your 4 Sources of Nourishment, what you need to thrive and live out your purpose:
Body Nourishment - the mindful act of caring for yourself through nutritious food and enjoyable movement.
Mind Nourishment - understanding how your mind interacts with your body and the Divine Presence in your life.
Heart Nourishment - developing a greater connection to others and to your own emotions.
Soul Nourishment - your practice of looking inward to discover and embrace your mission.
In our working together, my desire for you is wholeness.
Once reconnected within yourself, you will discover the answers to living in wholeness with a healthy body and a loving heart. Your body will love that you are using it for its designed purpose. Your soul will feel peaceful, certain and full.
Are you ready to change your life, your health and wellness? Let’s get started!